1. I learned that if I head-bang to music and dance all night, moving the next day will be difficult, very, very difficult, and painful, very, very painful!
2. I learned how to put all of the vacuum attachments together so that I could vacuum the couch! HA!
3. I learned that the, “easy,” setting, on my new digital camera that has abilities far superior to my own, is my new best friend!
4. I learned that I could easily trade eating desserts with spending money and buying treasures! No, not really, I take that back.
5. I learned that I can clean with out getting grumpy. I learned this once I vacuumed the tile in the kitchen, to pick up the pet hair that the broom and dust pan would not get. The more hair I swept up, the more hair that appeared! It was unnerving me, taking me down a road I rather not go…a road that would lead to a major temper-tantrum! I thought the world was playing a cruel trick on me, throwing hair on the tile as soon as I turned my back…I just kept sweeping and sweeping and the hair just kept coming and coming! I cursed the blasted tile! I spit on it, “Hack-puh!” Then, I ran the vacuum over the tile and all the hair disappeared with out a trace! I was a happy, happy soul again!
6. I learned that Dave and I need to get off our arse, hang pictures in our house and put out our treasures, AKA decorate, because showing people around a bare house and then having to explain that we’ve lived there for 7 months…and still nothing is decorated and there are piles of boxes in my office and in the guest room and in the garage…is a tad embarrassing!
7. I learned that having our friend’s Corvette in our garage is a nice distraction from all of the boxes in the garage!
8. I learned how to step into the modern day and use modern day hair ties and clips in my hair instead of scrunchies from1980s! (Probably my biggest feat this weekend!)
9. I learned that this January, when I was home sick and Dave was out of work, was one of the best months of my life, even in the midst of trying to control my asthma and Dave not working, and that I’ll probably never have a month like that again.
10. And, because I can’t top #9, there will be no #10 even though this sentence appears after #10 it’s not really #10…OK? Just had to throw that in there.
Monday, April 12, 2010
Friday, April 9, 2010
The Thrill of Spending Money
When Dave was not working, we put our debit and credit cards in a bucket of water and put the bucket in the freezer. We froze our spending!
Well, my hard working hubby is back at work, which means our house is a mess again and my “honey-do,” list has taken a back seat.
My pride and joy desk that I scored for $65 (SIXTY FIVE DOLLARS ON SALE…WHOOP-WHOOP!) is still sitting in a million pieces on the floor of my office. Someone actually had the nerve, the gall, to suggest that I put the desk together myself! Ha! “Pish-posh, rubbish” I said!
The last time that I attempted to put something together by myself it did not go so well!
Dave and I used to live in a small, tiny duplex that had an even smaller, tinier bathroom, which meant that the shower wasn’t much bigger than a bread box! Imagine trying to shave your legs in a shower that size! You have to be a contortionist! So, somehow, online, I found stools that were especially designed for showers. Imagine the thrill I felt at knowing such a contraption existed, which could possibly prevent me from having to do stretches and warm-ups before attempting to contort my body in all of these impossible ways just to have smooth legs! I even found stylish stools, made of teak that were like nice little shower seats (as opposed to hospital-style ones made for, you know, hospitals). My Birthday was approaching so I hinted to my Mom about these stools. Who knew that a hint as subtle as an email with a link to the right website would result in me actually getting one for my Birthday!
So, one sunny morning when I was home alone I decided to be independent and put the stool together myself. After minutes of organizing all of the pieces, losing half of them, becoming convinced that my stool did not come with all of the required pieces and then finding the pieces that I lost, the pieces that I didn’t think the stool came with (what, doesn’t that happen to you?), I began screwing stuff together. *I use the term, “stuff,” very loosely, so as not to confuse you with all of the technical lingo, I like to keep things in laymen’s terms so everyone understands what I mean… you’re welcome! I’m kidding; I had no idea what the stuff was called that I was screwing together!
Anyways, when I began screwing something into the bottom of the seat, it met a little bit of resistance. With crinkled eyebrows, I continued trying to screw the contraption together; but, it didn’t feel right. This, in all reality, should have been my first clue to stop what I was doing, turn the contraption over and see what was going on. Instead, I just looked at the directions again to make sure I was doing what the directions stated; it appeared I was, so I tried to screw the screw again. Something just wasn’t right! This time, I turned over my new teak seat to see what was happening.
Do you want to know what I saw? I saw the screw, sticking straight up through my new teak seat! I had screwed the stupid screw right through the top of the seat! Now, there was a nice hole and crack in my new seat. The new teak seat that was supposed to solve my leg shaving problems!
GRRR!
Disgusted with the whole assembly thing, I threw everything aside, leaving it for my wonderfully crafted, handy-man husband to assemble.
So, my new desk that is in a million pieces on the office floor is sitting there and waiting. Not waiting for me, though, because as sure as the sky is blue, that desk will fight me…so it will continue to sit there, in a million pieces, and wait…wait for my wonderfully crafted, handy-man husband to assemble the wooden mess with out causing death and destruction like I am prone to do!
Well, my hard working hubby is back at work, which means our house is a mess again and my “honey-do,” list has taken a back seat.
My pride and joy desk that I scored for $65 (SIXTY FIVE DOLLARS ON SALE…WHOOP-WHOOP!) is still sitting in a million pieces on the floor of my office. Someone actually had the nerve, the gall, to suggest that I put the desk together myself! Ha! “Pish-posh, rubbish” I said!
The last time that I attempted to put something together by myself it did not go so well!
Dave and I used to live in a small, tiny duplex that had an even smaller, tinier bathroom, which meant that the shower wasn’t much bigger than a bread box! Imagine trying to shave your legs in a shower that size! You have to be a contortionist! So, somehow, online, I found stools that were especially designed for showers. Imagine the thrill I felt at knowing such a contraption existed, which could possibly prevent me from having to do stretches and warm-ups before attempting to contort my body in all of these impossible ways just to have smooth legs! I even found stylish stools, made of teak that were like nice little shower seats (as opposed to hospital-style ones made for, you know, hospitals). My Birthday was approaching so I hinted to my Mom about these stools. Who knew that a hint as subtle as an email with a link to the right website would result in me actually getting one for my Birthday!
So, one sunny morning when I was home alone I decided to be independent and put the stool together myself. After minutes of organizing all of the pieces, losing half of them, becoming convinced that my stool did not come with all of the required pieces and then finding the pieces that I lost, the pieces that I didn’t think the stool came with (what, doesn’t that happen to you?), I began screwing stuff together. *I use the term, “stuff,” very loosely, so as not to confuse you with all of the technical lingo, I like to keep things in laymen’s terms so everyone understands what I mean… you’re welcome! I’m kidding; I had no idea what the stuff was called that I was screwing together!
Anyways, when I began screwing something into the bottom of the seat, it met a little bit of resistance. With crinkled eyebrows, I continued trying to screw the contraption together; but, it didn’t feel right. This, in all reality, should have been my first clue to stop what I was doing, turn the contraption over and see what was going on. Instead, I just looked at the directions again to make sure I was doing what the directions stated; it appeared I was, so I tried to screw the screw again. Something just wasn’t right! This time, I turned over my new teak seat to see what was happening.
Do you want to know what I saw? I saw the screw, sticking straight up through my new teak seat! I had screwed the stupid screw right through the top of the seat! Now, there was a nice hole and crack in my new seat. The new teak seat that was supposed to solve my leg shaving problems!
GRRR!
Disgusted with the whole assembly thing, I threw everything aside, leaving it for my wonderfully crafted, handy-man husband to assemble.
So, my new desk that is in a million pieces on the office floor is sitting there and waiting. Not waiting for me, though, because as sure as the sky is blue, that desk will fight me…so it will continue to sit there, in a million pieces, and wait…wait for my wonderfully crafted, handy-man husband to assemble the wooden mess with out causing death and destruction like I am prone to do!
Thursday, April 8, 2010
I've got another Confession to make...
I broke a tradition; well, actually, I did not break the tradition, the man that I live with, who will remain nameless, broke this tradition. It’s a big one folks and I can only hope that the victim of this broken tradition can forgive me!
You see, every year, Resees makes a miniature peanut butter egg, covered in a hard chocolate shell, and they only come out once a year during Easter. One year, my little roommate, Jennifer, and I discovered these delightfully delicious creations…and we ate the entire bag…in one night…in an hour…OK, it was half an hour!
WHAT?!?! They’re just like M&Ms! You can’t tell me you’ve never eaten an entire bag of M&Ms! Stop the judging!
Then, after that one delicious Easter, the Resees eggs disappeared, much to our horror, never to be seen again!
We were so sad…so velly, velly sad.
Then, one Easter, a few years later, the Resees eggs reappeared!
JOY TO THE WORLD!
I quickly bought a bag and gave it to Jennifer, which would be the start of the tradition.
This year, I bought two bags of the tasty treat; one, to take to my Mom’s on Easter and the other one being for Jennifer.
Herein lies the problem…I live with someone who loves this Easter creation almost as much as my little roommate, Jennifer does and this man…er, mouse, had heartbroken taste buds when we left my Mom’s house on Easter with out any of the Reeses candies that we had arrived with. This mouse, who inhabits my dwelling, early Monday morning, unbeknown st to me, opened and munched on the Reeses Peanut Butter Eggs… that were for Jennifer!
OH FOR SHAME!
I need to say it again.
OH FOR SHAME!
I noticed this as soon as I went home for lunch; so I immediately rushed to Wal-Mart to purchase another bag but…but…but, Wal-Mart was out of them! “HOW CAN THIS BEEEE,” I screamed! “NOOOOOO,” I moaned, as I dropped to my knees in the middle of the Easter Clearance aisle, all of my hopes and dreams of fulfilling the tradition gone, vanished! I was surrounded by vicious and malicious bargain hunters who didn’t care one bit about the trauma that was unfolding right in front of them. They only cared about purchasing left over Easter paraphernalia at a discounted price…it was almost as bad as the day after Thanksgiving, the pushing, shoving, shouting, crying. Pitiful folks, it was pitiful!
As I started to stand up again, I whimpered softly to myself, “I would have paid full price…sniff, sniff…I would have paid full price…”
Maybe someday I will explore why all of my holidays have a commercial candy associated with them…CELEBRATE DOES NOT MEAN FOOD, MISSY! Bah-humbug!
You see, every year, Resees makes a miniature peanut butter egg, covered in a hard chocolate shell, and they only come out once a year during Easter. One year, my little roommate, Jennifer, and I discovered these delightfully delicious creations…and we ate the entire bag…in one night…in an hour…OK, it was half an hour!
WHAT?!?! They’re just like M&Ms! You can’t tell me you’ve never eaten an entire bag of M&Ms! Stop the judging!
Then, after that one delicious Easter, the Resees eggs disappeared, much to our horror, never to be seen again!
We were so sad…so velly, velly sad.
Then, one Easter, a few years later, the Resees eggs reappeared!
JOY TO THE WORLD!
I quickly bought a bag and gave it to Jennifer, which would be the start of the tradition.
This year, I bought two bags of the tasty treat; one, to take to my Mom’s on Easter and the other one being for Jennifer.
Herein lies the problem…I live with someone who loves this Easter creation almost as much as my little roommate, Jennifer does and this man…er, mouse, had heartbroken taste buds when we left my Mom’s house on Easter with out any of the Reeses candies that we had arrived with. This mouse, who inhabits my dwelling, early Monday morning, unbeknown st to me, opened and munched on the Reeses Peanut Butter Eggs… that were for Jennifer!
OH FOR SHAME!
I need to say it again.
OH FOR SHAME!
I noticed this as soon as I went home for lunch; so I immediately rushed to Wal-Mart to purchase another bag but…but…but, Wal-Mart was out of them! “HOW CAN THIS BEEEE,” I screamed! “NOOOOOO,” I moaned, as I dropped to my knees in the middle of the Easter Clearance aisle, all of my hopes and dreams of fulfilling the tradition gone, vanished! I was surrounded by vicious and malicious bargain hunters who didn’t care one bit about the trauma that was unfolding right in front of them. They only cared about purchasing left over Easter paraphernalia at a discounted price…it was almost as bad as the day after Thanksgiving, the pushing, shoving, shouting, crying. Pitiful folks, it was pitiful!
As I started to stand up again, I whimpered softly to myself, “I would have paid full price…sniff, sniff…I would have paid full price…”
Maybe someday I will explore why all of my holidays have a commercial candy associated with them…CELEBRATE DOES NOT MEAN FOOD, MISSY! Bah-humbug!
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Hmmm...A Glimpse Inside My Head
How does love turn to hate? At one point, most couples profess their love to each other. At some point, both people usually mean it. So, when that lovely relationship ends, what makes the love turn to hate?
If you read or watch the news, you can’t help but see a story on Kate and/or Jon every now and again. We all know they’re divorced. But, now, it seems they have total spite towards each other. This made me wonder:
How does a couple get from love to spite?
Can you not have love with out hate? Is it an emotion that goes hand-in-hand? Sure, I love Dave and I am happy with our relationship, I would even venture to say we have a good relationship and Dave would too; and sure, he has behaviors that I could say I hate…who doesn’t? But, that doesn’t mean I hate him.
Hmmm…
It just makes me wonder.
When people are in relationships and both report being happy, you can’t help but wonder how one gets from happy to unhappy.
I don’t buy that it is because of a breakdown in communication. I guess I buy the idea that it is a multitude of factors that can end a relationship (lack of communication + lots of stress with no relief + differing thoughts/values/opinions…etc).
It still doesn’t answer my question, thou. How does a couple go from love to hate? Is it because we can’t handle failure so we lash out, blaming the other for the failure of the relationship. In most articles that I’ve read people who are content with their divorce and accept part of the blame do not seem to hate their ex.
Hmmm…
Or, is it the pain? The pain of losing a loved one causes, or leads to, the hate? Anger is a mask for pain. That’s right! This makes sense to me now.
So, my answer to the question; how does love turn to hate, would be, it’s because of the pain. The pain and hurt people feel for losing a person, an entity (the relationship) that they might have enjoyed...someone took that away from them against their will. Children get mad when you take their toys away from them. Why wouldn’t adults get mad when something they enjoy is taken away from them? Anger is a mask for pain. Hate, and being spiteful, might actually be a simpler emotion to handle, rather than dealing with the lonely, gut wrenching, pain of losing a relationship, companionship that you never wanted to be rid of in the first place.
I just love it when I can answer my own questions!
If you read or watch the news, you can’t help but see a story on Kate and/or Jon every now and again. We all know they’re divorced. But, now, it seems they have total spite towards each other. This made me wonder:
How does a couple get from love to spite?
Can you not have love with out hate? Is it an emotion that goes hand-in-hand? Sure, I love Dave and I am happy with our relationship, I would even venture to say we have a good relationship and Dave would too; and sure, he has behaviors that I could say I hate…who doesn’t? But, that doesn’t mean I hate him.
Hmmm…
It just makes me wonder.
When people are in relationships and both report being happy, you can’t help but wonder how one gets from happy to unhappy.
I don’t buy that it is because of a breakdown in communication. I guess I buy the idea that it is a multitude of factors that can end a relationship (lack of communication + lots of stress with no relief + differing thoughts/values/opinions…etc).
It still doesn’t answer my question, thou. How does a couple go from love to hate? Is it because we can’t handle failure so we lash out, blaming the other for the failure of the relationship. In most articles that I’ve read people who are content with their divorce and accept part of the blame do not seem to hate their ex.
Hmmm…
Or, is it the pain? The pain of losing a loved one causes, or leads to, the hate? Anger is a mask for pain. That’s right! This makes sense to me now.
So, my answer to the question; how does love turn to hate, would be, it’s because of the pain. The pain and hurt people feel for losing a person, an entity (the relationship) that they might have enjoyed...someone took that away from them against their will. Children get mad when you take their toys away from them. Why wouldn’t adults get mad when something they enjoy is taken away from them? Anger is a mask for pain. Hate, and being spiteful, might actually be a simpler emotion to handle, rather than dealing with the lonely, gut wrenching, pain of losing a relationship, companionship that you never wanted to be rid of in the first place.
I just love it when I can answer my own questions!
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
It was a calm and sunny morning. The dew on the bright green grass of the lawns shimmered and shone like they had been saving it up all winter, sprinkling the neighborhood with a glistening that had been missing lately. It was as if the lawns had simultaneously decided to display their pride and joy and bestow this beauty, this treasure as a declaration that yes, sunny days are here again. The trees in the neighborhood allowed for beautiful sunbeams to infuse the lawns and gardens, creating a colorful display of lights in both front and back yards on this fresh sunny morning.
The bright sun lit up the insides of the houses, leaving no need to turn on any of the indoor lights. People awoke; feeling well rested…what a difference! With the sun peeking through the windows, who could resist feeling well rested and…and…and content? Yes, content!
The smell of coffee soon began to permeate this calm and peaceful morning. Ahhh, sunshine and coffee…who could ask for anything more?!
And, for this beautiful, brief moment in time, all forgot that such a thing as trouble existed in this world.
The bright sun lit up the insides of the houses, leaving no need to turn on any of the indoor lights. People awoke; feeling well rested…what a difference! With the sun peeking through the windows, who could resist feeling well rested and…and…and content? Yes, content!
The smell of coffee soon began to permeate this calm and peaceful morning. Ahhh, sunshine and coffee…who could ask for anything more?!
And, for this beautiful, brief moment in time, all forgot that such a thing as trouble existed in this world.
Monday, April 5, 2010
I Forgot the Green Beans!
On Easter Sunday, the one dish that I said I would bring was a Green Bean Casserole…the Green Bean Casserole that I brought to Thanksgiving dinner…the Green Bean Casserole that went over like hot fudge on a sundae…the Green Bean Casserole that I totally, 100% did not bring…the Green Bean Casserole that I did not even make!
OH FOR SHAME!
On Thanksgiving, Missy’s culinary skills blew everyone outta the water! I could read their minds, they were thinking,”Maybe we’re wrong about Missy being a disaster in the kitchen, that girl can make one MEAN green bean casserole!” (Courtesy of Paula, who graciously escorted me through the grocery section of Wal-Mart one year, hand picking the ingredients that I would need.) Lucky for me, the instructions to making the green bean casserole are graciously printed on the box of fried onion thingamajiggies that make the casserole so yummy. Also lucky for me, I included the 1/8 of a teaspoon of pepper that the recipe called for. I thought, “What the heck does 1/8th of a teaspoon of pepper do?”, and I contemplated leaving it out all together. Thankfully, I did not; as I was informed at Thanksgiving by the culinary masters in my family that 1/8th of a teaspoon of pepper is actually velly, velly important!
So, apparently, at some time, I volunteered myself to bring said dish to our Easter dinner. The thought must have left my mind as soon as the volunteer left my mouth. And, it beguiles me as to how my whole freaking family, all 15 of them that were there, KNEW that I was supposed to bring the green bean casserole when I didn’t even know! I know that all 17 of us did not have a sit-down pre-Easter meeting, deciding who would be bringing what…so, being the great detective that I am; I deduced that someone, one of my family members, ratted me out!
I will have you know, though, I did bring a lot of Easter candy for the adults to munch on, as they are too old to receive Easter Baskets from the Easter Bunny! I brought two different assortments of Jelly Beans, chocolate candy, carrot cake cookies, and a delicious strawberry cheesecake for Dave’s birthday…and not one family member was complaining about there not being any green beans as they were shoving junk food down their throats!
Isn’t that more the issue here, folks? My family has a problem. A junk food problem. It’s a serious problem. So serious, in fact, that in an effort to deflect from their addictive tendencies, they sold me out, pretending to be distressed that there were no green beans included in our feast.
What made it all better? How was I able to get through Easter with everyone glaring at me, sending daggers my way, even resorting to picking on my genius football, yes, genius, football knowledge?
Through alcohol consumption…lots and lots of alcohol consumption! Let’s be honest, how can you have a family gathering without it? Shoot, my family even debates whether or not we can have alcohol at our little family bible studies…before you scoff, I’ll have you know, families that pray together, stay together, whether there’s alcohol or not!
Lucky for us, we have a bartender in the family! Every family needs one of those and my family luckily enough actually has a few! Hmmm…I wonder if that’s why we all like each other so much. Nah! So, my bartender brother was there, keeping the drinks flowing as fast as the smack-talking was smacking.
And that, folks, was my very happy and fun Easter/Dave’s Birthday!
OH FOR SHAME!
On Thanksgiving, Missy’s culinary skills blew everyone outta the water! I could read their minds, they were thinking,”Maybe we’re wrong about Missy being a disaster in the kitchen, that girl can make one MEAN green bean casserole!” (Courtesy of Paula, who graciously escorted me through the grocery section of Wal-Mart one year, hand picking the ingredients that I would need.) Lucky for me, the instructions to making the green bean casserole are graciously printed on the box of fried onion thingamajiggies that make the casserole so yummy. Also lucky for me, I included the 1/8 of a teaspoon of pepper that the recipe called for. I thought, “What the heck does 1/8th of a teaspoon of pepper do?”, and I contemplated leaving it out all together. Thankfully, I did not; as I was informed at Thanksgiving by the culinary masters in my family that 1/8th of a teaspoon of pepper is actually velly, velly important!
So, apparently, at some time, I volunteered myself to bring said dish to our Easter dinner. The thought must have left my mind as soon as the volunteer left my mouth. And, it beguiles me as to how my whole freaking family, all 15 of them that were there, KNEW that I was supposed to bring the green bean casserole when I didn’t even know! I know that all 17 of us did not have a sit-down pre-Easter meeting, deciding who would be bringing what…so, being the great detective that I am; I deduced that someone, one of my family members, ratted me out!
I will have you know, though, I did bring a lot of Easter candy for the adults to munch on, as they are too old to receive Easter Baskets from the Easter Bunny! I brought two different assortments of Jelly Beans, chocolate candy, carrot cake cookies, and a delicious strawberry cheesecake for Dave’s birthday…and not one family member was complaining about there not being any green beans as they were shoving junk food down their throats!
Isn’t that more the issue here, folks? My family has a problem. A junk food problem. It’s a serious problem. So serious, in fact, that in an effort to deflect from their addictive tendencies, they sold me out, pretending to be distressed that there were no green beans included in our feast.
What made it all better? How was I able to get through Easter with everyone glaring at me, sending daggers my way, even resorting to picking on my genius football, yes, genius, football knowledge?
Through alcohol consumption…lots and lots of alcohol consumption! Let’s be honest, how can you have a family gathering without it? Shoot, my family even debates whether or not we can have alcohol at our little family bible studies…before you scoff, I’ll have you know, families that pray together, stay together, whether there’s alcohol or not!
Lucky for us, we have a bartender in the family! Every family needs one of those and my family luckily enough actually has a few! Hmmm…I wonder if that’s why we all like each other so much. Nah! So, my bartender brother was there, keeping the drinks flowing as fast as the smack-talking was smacking.
And that, folks, was my very happy and fun Easter/Dave’s Birthday!
Thursday, April 1, 2010
April Fools Day!
It was a sunny Hawaiian morning. The house was rustling with the sounds of a family getting ready for the day ahead of them. A little girl woke up with sleepies in her eyes, got out of bed, brushed her hair, put on her school uniform which consisted of khaki shorts and a navy blue polo shirt. As the blonde haired, blue eyed tween started styling her hair, the home phone rang interrupting the quietness that engulfs a house when people are in the throws of waking up and getting ready to take on the day. Wondering who could be calling, but figuring it would be her dad who was already at work, the young lady answered the phone.
“Shaws, Missy Shaw speaking,” the words ran together like it was one, big, long word because Missy had been speaking that phrase since she was bestowed the honor of being able to answer the home phone. Of course, being the imaginative and creative child that she was, when Missy was ill with the chicken pox, she would answer the home telephone saying, “Shaws, chicken pox Missy speaking”!
What Missy heard on the other end of the line on that sunny week day morning was a nice lady’s voice. “Hi Missy, this is the school secretary at Holy Family Catholic School, I am calling to let you know that a water line broke at the school and the school is flooded; so, school is cancelled for today!”
With the excitement that a child normally only feels on Christmas morning as they run out to the living room to see if the present of their dreams is proudly displayed, bright and shining, under the Christmas tree, Missy exclaimed, “OK! Thank you so much!” and with that, she hung up the phone. She couldn't believe this good news!
Running as fast as she could down the hallway to the kitchen where her mom was dutifully preparing lunch and breakfast, Missy excitedly told her mom the good news.
Mom was skeptical, though.
“What did she have to be skeptical about,” Missy wondered just as the phone started ringing again.
Missy ran to the phone and answered it again. This time it was her Grandma calling from California. “Oh, hi, Grandma!,” Missy said into the receiver, thinking what a great morning this was, finding out that school had been cancelled AND getting a phone call from her Grandma.
Her Grandma asked her, “Did you get a phone call from your school secretary telling you school was cancelled?”
This totally perplexed Missy. How did she know that, Missy wondered, she lives an ocean away from us! Did it make the news, Missy wondered! “Yea,” Missy answered slowly, "How did you know?"
“APRIL FOOLS!” said the Grandmother into the phone.
“WHAT? WHAT?! NO WAY!” Missy exclaimed! She only heard the ringing of her Grandma’s laughter on the other end of the phone. “Sorry Sweetie, school isn’t really cancelled, that was me who called you earlier” her Grandma stated apologetically. “Ahhh, man!” Missy replied, deflated of all the excitement she felt earlier, looking at her mom who was standing before her, laughing at the practical joke that had just been successfully pulled off!
That, my friends, is the best April Fools Day joke that has ever been played on me. Grandma has never even tried to top that one!
“Shaws, Missy Shaw speaking,” the words ran together like it was one, big, long word because Missy had been speaking that phrase since she was bestowed the honor of being able to answer the home phone. Of course, being the imaginative and creative child that she was, when Missy was ill with the chicken pox, she would answer the home telephone saying, “Shaws, chicken pox Missy speaking”!
What Missy heard on the other end of the line on that sunny week day morning was a nice lady’s voice. “Hi Missy, this is the school secretary at Holy Family Catholic School, I am calling to let you know that a water line broke at the school and the school is flooded; so, school is cancelled for today!”
With the excitement that a child normally only feels on Christmas morning as they run out to the living room to see if the present of their dreams is proudly displayed, bright and shining, under the Christmas tree, Missy exclaimed, “OK! Thank you so much!” and with that, she hung up the phone. She couldn't believe this good news!
Running as fast as she could down the hallway to the kitchen where her mom was dutifully preparing lunch and breakfast, Missy excitedly told her mom the good news.
Mom was skeptical, though.
“What did she have to be skeptical about,” Missy wondered just as the phone started ringing again.
Missy ran to the phone and answered it again. This time it was her Grandma calling from California. “Oh, hi, Grandma!,” Missy said into the receiver, thinking what a great morning this was, finding out that school had been cancelled AND getting a phone call from her Grandma.
Her Grandma asked her, “Did you get a phone call from your school secretary telling you school was cancelled?”
This totally perplexed Missy. How did she know that, Missy wondered, she lives an ocean away from us! Did it make the news, Missy wondered! “Yea,” Missy answered slowly, "How did you know?"
“APRIL FOOLS!” said the Grandmother into the phone.
“WHAT? WHAT?! NO WAY!” Missy exclaimed! She only heard the ringing of her Grandma’s laughter on the other end of the phone. “Sorry Sweetie, school isn’t really cancelled, that was me who called you earlier” her Grandma stated apologetically. “Ahhh, man!” Missy replied, deflated of all the excitement she felt earlier, looking at her mom who was standing before her, laughing at the practical joke that had just been successfully pulled off!
That, my friends, is the best April Fools Day joke that has ever been played on me. Grandma has never even tried to top that one!
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