This is a conversation between a husband and a wife during a multi-hour, all encompassing, curtain install.
UGH.
Husband (standing on ladder when a curtain-install mishap occurs…a few hours into curtain-install Heaven…I hope you taste the sarcasm!): SHOOT! Can you get me the Phillips screw driver?
Wife (eager to help and stay calm for her frustrated husband…all she needed was a dress, apron and high heels and she would be perfect!): Is that the flat one?
Husband: No.
Wife (is walking away to get Phillips screw driver): Oh, OK, it’s the star one, where is it?
Husband: On the couch
Wife (comes back into the room): It’s not on the couch.
Husband: It has to be.
Wife: Well, it’s not.
Husband (he actually stops what he is doing): Hmmm…
Wife: Maybe it’s on the kitchen island.
Husband: Yea, check the island.
Wife (comes back into the room with screw driver): It was on the island.
She hands the screw driver to distracted husband.
Wife (not distracted by the curtain-install because all she is doing is a lot of hurry-up-and-wait, starts thinking): What did you say the one I just handed you is called?
Husband (still distracted, up on a ladder, working intently on curtain-install): Phillips
Wife: That makes no sense…it should be called the star one.
Husband snorts.
If women ruled the world!
Curtain-install hit a wall head-on when the first two, not one but two, attempts to hem sheer curtains failed miserably. Husband and wife decided to pay a professional to hem the curtains.
Wife: Dumping curtains off and paying someone to hem them, totally worth it.
Husband: NO KIDDING!
Wife: Can we hire a cook?
Henry F. Phillips (1890–1958) was a U.S. businessman from Portland, Oregon. The Phillips-head ("crosshead") screw and screwdriver are named after him.
ReplyDeleteThe importance of the crosshead screw design lies in its self-centering property, useful on automated production lines that use powered screwdrivers. Phillips' major contribution was in driving the crosshead concept forward to the point where it was adopted by screwmakers and automobile companies.
There are actually about 30 different types of 'star' patterns... and they all have different names. Most households only keep these two around...
along with their normal collection of cookbooks.
Now that you've mastered screwdrivers... you could be on to something... hmmm?