I have had friends who have had to go on interviews; I have had friends who lost their job. I was always, ALWAYS the first one in line saying, "You'll be OK, everything will work out," or, "It's for the best," and, "Hang in there." When it came to interview advice, same thing, "Don't be nervous, you're gonna do great!" or, "Give it your all, be yourself, you'll be great."
I didn't realize how unhelpful all of that crap was until the last few weeks!
Interviewing is freaking exhausting (emotionally) and it's nerve racking! I have this large inner dialog with myself where I try and reason with me and talk me out of being nervous. It doesn't work. Freaken inner dialog!
Additionally, in my head, I know I am going to be fine and that this lay off is not the end of the world...I'm kind of tired of people telling me that, though! (I am only partially kidding.)
I have learned that there's a lot to be said for a little sympathy!
When I told my father that I got laid off, he sounded as though someone punched him in the gut, and that made me feel better! (I know, I'm a sicko)
I am very blessed as I have a lot of supportive people in my life encouraging me while at the same time being sympathetic.
Those few that weren't, those few that acted like me losing a job that I have had for 4.25 years was no big deal, was karma coming back and biting me in the big ol' fat arse, making me eat my words, big time! Oh, karma's a B****! I now more so than ever, realize the power of words...and how much I sucked when I was giving my friends those meaningless sentiments, "You'll be OK, everything will be fine," when life threw them a curve ball that gave them a black eye. They needed ice, I gave them water. Still, better than nothing; but, I have learned that those sentiments do not offer comfort!
SO! I pledge to you here and now, if something sucky ever happens to you, I promise to give you sympathy and comfort... and to help you get revenge on the bastard that hurt you! (By 'bastard' I am not implying 'man', no sexism here, folks! By 'bastard' I am referring to whatever entity caused pain.)
And, I'm not really serious about the revenge part...cause I don't want any more karma!
It's not about what happens to you in life... it's about what you do with it.
ReplyDeleteWhen you get punched in the gut, you double over... but you've got to stand up tall eventually...
So now... enjoy your pity party (you deserve it, trust me)
But then get back to your normal cheerful self.. cause the other doesn't suit you well.
PS... yes all those encouraging words do help. It's just better if you say them while handing your friend a beer! :P
I don't think karma has anything to do with any of this! And your friends that you encouraged are all doing great now! Sometimes we need to hear someone tell us that everything will be ok so that we can believe it too.
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